On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business."
At a Proctologist's door: "To expedite your visit please back in."
On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."
In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."
At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."
And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."