EnjoyBeing (enjoybeing) wrote,

  • Mood:

I love the vent

From ajc.com - Living Vent

Last weekend -
    "To announce that there must be no criticism of the president or that we are to stand by the president right or wrong is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the american public." Theodore Roosevelt.

Monday -
    Then there was the sign at a pro-war rally, held by the guy with a mullet and unlaced high top shoes, that read: You librals are all morans!

    I just figured out that "ABC" song is to the tune of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star".

    The more I think about it, the more I feel it was not an earthquake, but Georgia trying to free itself from Alabama.

    Genetic engineers say even males have the capacity to make eggs. Wives have always known that if they're hungry enough, they can and will.

    Also from Theodore Roosevelt, "the man who really counts in the world is the doer, not the mere critic-the man who actually does the work, even if roughly and imperfectly, not the man who only talks or writes about how it ought to be done."

    Won't we need to impose another tax on cigarettes to pay for all these new flags?

Tuesday -
    "Baa, Baa Black sheep," "ABC's" and "twinkle, twinkle little star" are all the same tune.

    Where do I submit my design for the 2005-2007 Georgia State Flag?

    My husband is apparently very eager for me to start exercising again. Imagine my surprise to wake up this morning and discover I was already wearing my running shoes and my Walkman.

    Ok enough with the rain and bad weather already. Could the person who did the rain dance please revoke it and do a little sunny weather dance? Thanks in advance.

    I told my husband I went shopping at Kohl's because there was a 15 percent discount for senior citizens. "So how many did you buy?" he asked.

Wednesday -
    I did not vote for Dubya, but I'd prefer he do no more stunts with jets. If something goes wrong, we get Dick.

Thursday -
    I have found out that my flashlight is just a case for dead batteries.

    I don't think anyone has pointed out yet that the melody for the Alphabet Song and "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" was written by Mozart. Sorry, I don't know what he called it.

    I got somebody's goat once. I was pretty proud, but then I thought, what am I going to do with a goat?

    Sweet tea: The table wine of the South.

    Today I told my boyfriend I was canceling my subscription to his issues because I've had enough.

Friday -
    Old Saying:Be wary of strangers bearing gifts.
    New Saying:Be on the lookout for the UPS guy with the large package.

    Dubya's Iraqi campaign is a Weapon of Mass Distraction...

    Sponge Bob is not a contraceptive.

    Why is it that guy on the Verizon commercials can get a signal where ever he goes, but I can't get one in my own apartment?

This weekend -
    I guess "Are you better off now than you were four years ago?" wouldn't be a good idea for a Republican campaign slogan.

    Your yard may be under water, but look at the bright side: Fire ants can't swim.

    What is that man in Avondale Estates thinking? How can you have a lime green house with purple polka dots without a single pink flamingo?

    I've dealt extensively with pilots and the only way to make them happy is give them all the money they want and then let them stay home to count it.

    Instead of "Song," Delta should have called its new airline "Prayer."

    Coude the people who sendd me SPåM pleese use spelt checker firts?


  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded